“I wanted to do something different with this relationship because I felt something different about him,” she said.
I was so excited to hear and read of former Destiny’s Child member, and current solo artist, songwriter, and actress, LeToya Luckett’s recent engagement to Tommicus Walker. A beautiful black man that we hadn’t seen or heard about until now! How they do that!?
I’ll tell you how they did it! Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting the same result. Change is doing something different expecting a new result! And her result: a ring! Why? Because she decided to do something different, not because it was a formula to get a ring, but because it was a different relationship in which both parties desired a different result.
Luckett was in a long-term relationship and eventually married, author and public speaker, Rob Hillman Sr. in 2016. It unfortunately ended in divorce after two months, but we saw them everywhere. There were numerous pictures of them together and it was not a secret of their relationship.
Many times, constantly posting pictures on social media of your relationship early on in the dating process simply invites the opinions, thoughts, and feelings of parties who have no investment or direct involvement in your relationship. It can breed bitterness and jealousy in some, ill-will curiosity in others, and magnify issues that were never brought to the surface.
You can begin to rate and base your relationship off how many likes or comments you receive, asking yourself: are we really suppose to be together? Is he really that attractive, or is it just me? Why does she keep liking all my man’s pictures? And the drama begins.
Luckett stated in her exclusive Essence interview, “I feel it’s very important to build your foundation first before sharing your relationship with the world.”
If you don’t know his religious beliefs; where he stands on important issues concerning his morals and values, social media is not where you need to proclaim your relationship status. Time spent with one another is where you have the necessary conversations that allow you to build a foundation on the truth about one another and not the perception of what you believe and/or desire to portray.
The goal of a relationship should never be to prove that you are in one, but to make sure it’s the right one to be in. It’s nothing worse than posting picturess of you and “bae,” only to find out “bae” is “cra-cra,” and NOT the one for you or Facebook letting everyone know when you changed your status from “In a relationship,” to “Single.” Be prepared for the comments, phone calls, and DMs. Believe me! I’ve been there!The goal of a relationship should never be to prove that you are in one, but to make sure it’s the right one to be in. Click To Tweet
The article goes on to share that before meeting her fiancee, Luckett was in a place of prayer, seeking God for something different. After sharing her prayer request with a friend at a wedding, she was introduced to Walker, and the rest is history.
This story not only made my heart happy because I love black love, and simply love in general, but it reminded me, as I’m on Day 21 of my “40 Day Prayer Challenge,” that I must keep circling my prayers! God is listening and preparing the right man, for the right time, at the right season in my life.
Luckett is 36 years old and experiencing a second chance at love. She shares in various interviews her lessons learned on past relationships and the fight to stay open to love, even when she felt like love wasn’t open to her.
I’m also on Day 29 of my Dating Fast and Lord knows I’m ready for something different. It’s really why I decided to do this fast and reclaim my time. Being open to love and love seemingly passing you by is difficult at times and hard to accept or comprehend when everyone expects that you should be married by now. But this time has allowed me to pump the breaks on expectations and accelerate my chase after God and His will.
Expect to only see my engagement photos on Facebook the next time my relationship status changes!! I’m doing it “Letoya Luckett style!” But most importantly, I’m doing it God’s way!